Papa, Can You Hear Me?
by ttfan111robstar1
Summary: Inspired by the song of the same name. Castiel finally meets his father, and they talk. Contains some spoilers from Season 11.


Castiel sat up, his vessel's head throbbing with pain. He looked around the room, realizing for the first time that Lucifer had left him. He pulled himself up from the ground and looked around. Dean was the closest to him, and helped him to his feet, recognizing that it was him and not Lucifer that was conscious. Cas looked around and saw Sam, Rowena, Crowley, and Chuck Shurley standing there. He remembered only vaguely why they were there, but for some reason he could not remember why Chuck was there. Perhaps it was an effect of Lucifer's making. He stood up, disoriented for a moment, before his eyes landed on Chuck again. Something about him was bothering him deeply, though he couldn't figure out why for the life of him. Chuck, sensing his gaze, looked at him.

For a beat, neither one breathed.

Then, it clicked. Castiel's eyes widened. Shocked and awed, he whispered in enochian, "Father?"

Chuck gave him a tiny, wistful little smile and nodded, eyes sparkling, despite the pain he was in.

Castiel stepped back slightly, reeling from the surprise. He felt cold, chilled to the bone as he looked into the face of the one he had so long sought after. After all this time, he had known his father all along. All of his failures danced through his mind at once, and he felt embarrassed as his father looked at him. He was naked and exposed to this man, the one who had seen all he'd done. Unconsciously, he wrapped his featherless wings around himself in shame, trying to hide from the one who made him.

"Do not hide from me." Said Chuck. On instinct, his wings folded back at the powerful voice. Castiel's gaze shifted to the floor as the powerful cocktail of emotions overtook his body. The anger, hurt, fear, surprise, and shame fought for control of his emotional state. For the first time in his life, he wanted to run away. He almost tried to, unable to look his father in the face, but Dean stopped him, made him stay.

He stayed as Dean was filled with souls, and went off to save them all from his wicked aunt. Those of them who were left behind went to a bar to await the end of the world or the saving of it.

They all went into the run down bar, Sam keeping an eye on Chuck. Castiel didn't know what to say. The words he was looking for evaded him, and the questions he had wouldn't come to mind. He wanted to say something, but nothing came out of his mouth.

Chuck, sensing his son's indecision, sent Sam away for a few minutes so that they could talk. He beckoned him over with the wave of his hand. Castiel sat in front of him, looking vaguely nervous and fidgety.

"Don't be afraid, Castiel." Chuck soothed. "I'm not angry with you. I'm not disappointed in you either. I'm proud of you."

Castiel paused. "What?"

"You've done well. You have saved many people by working with the Winchesters."

Castiel gawked at him. "But aren't you ashamed by what I've done? I've set leviathans free, I've broken Lucifer out of his cage, and I tried to take your place! How can you be proud of me after all of that?!"

Chuck smiled, a sad little smile. "Because you're my son. And no matter what you do, I will always love you."

"Then why did you hide from me when I tried to find you?" He choked out. His emotions were getting the best of him now. "Why did you stay away? Why didn't you _help_?"

Chuck paused a moment, thinking of what to say.

"When I created you, I knew your entire life story. The instant I formed you, I knew the questions you'd ask me, the orders you'd take, The wounds you would suffer- everything. Every single thing you went through was a piece that was necessary to get you to where you are now. I heard you when you prayed for me. But I knew that I had to let you do this on your own or you would never learn how strong you really were." Castiel was quiet, thinking over the words. Chuck took the opportunity to continue. "But just because I didn't intervene does not mean that I don't care about you or Dean or Sam, or anyone else. It means that I had to let you go, or you would have never grown. I have always wanted the best for you, your brothers and sisters, and for humanity. But I had to learn to let go and let you and everyone else make their own mistakes. And I want you to know that I'm sorry if I ever hurt you by doing that. But I will always be proud of you. You are one of the best angels I have ever created, and you have carried out the task I gave you."

Castiel stared at the table in front of him for a long time, absorbing the words his father had said to him. Finally, he looked at Chuck, who was looking at him with an expression full of the purest kind of pride. Tentatively, Castiel smiled at him. Chuck smiled back, and Castiel moved over near him. He leaned over and, in his own awkward fashion, hugged his father for the first time. When Castiel let go, Chuck reached up and touched his son's forehead. It took all of his strength to do it, but it would be well worth it. A flash of bright light flooded the room, and they all looked over to where Castiel stood. Only Chuck and Crowley could see what had transpired. Castiel could feel it, though. He reached out a hand and swiped it downwards.

His wings had feathers. He could fly again.

Chuck grinned up at him, despite the intense pain he was in. Castiel looked at him and smiled.

"Thank you... Dad."

Chuck nodded. Now, if it came down to it, he could die in peace. Because his son was happy. That was all that mattered to him now.

Castiel stayed with his father until it was time for Chuck to leave and see his sister. Then, he sat in the bar, staring at the empty space beside him. He ran a hand over his wings, and hoped for the best. If fate allowed his father to live, he would do whatever it took to make him well again. Until then though, he would be grateful for the short time he had with him.

It was the gift he'd always wanted.


End file.
